A Cliche HighSchool Romance
by nyanchan101
Summary: Dave Strider is a total douche, who hangs out with other total douches. Karkat Vantas is an anti-social nerd who is new in town. He meets Dave, and his romcom fantasies start to get to him. DaveKat shenanigans ensue. Humanstuck, DaveKat, and many other ships. Warnings for foul language, bitchy/doucheyness, and Kankri.
1. Chapter 1: Dave

**Hello and welcome to 'A Cliche HighSchool Romance'! This story is being written by yours truly, and my wonderful Matesprit, so updates may be quite spaced out and long, or we might have a chapter every day. I hope you enjoy our writing, and reviews are always very welcome (encouraged, even).**

I'm Dave Strider, cool kid extraordinaire. I'm the most awesomely ironic high-schooler you will ever meet. I'd go on and on about my personality and shit, but I'm guessing you already know all about that. Besides I'm gonna be late for school; I don't have time for that kind of crap.

I grabbed a comb, running it through my hair as I covered my eyes with my shades. I slipped on a red, gear themed hoodie, putting my backpack over my shoulder and jumping on my skateboard. I left the house without saying bye to my bro, I never do. He doesn't seem to care much. I glided easily across the streets to where my high school was; it wasn't a hard path to follow.

When I reached said school, I stopped, kicking my skateboard up and tucking it under my shoulder. I nodded at a few people (only when they said 'hi' or waved, though) until I had reached the stairs where my friends always hung out. We were like the Plastics in Mean Girls, only _way_cooler. Our group was made up by me, John Egbert—the dorky nerd who was only really there because he and I went way back—, Vriska Serket—who's a total bitch and we'd like to get rid of her, only we're pretty sure she could destroy us with the snap of her fingers—, Jade Harley—cheerleader—, Gamzee Makara –douche-y stoner—, and Sollux Captor—a total nerd who we let join the group so we could copy his homework, but he's both surprisingly cool and a hacker who could easily blow up our computers in eight seconds.

"Sup,"I greeted, taking my rightful place leaning against the wall.

Sollux pulled out the Science homework on instinct, and handed it to Dave.

"Wow, Sollux. I'm offended that you automatically assume that I didn't do my homework!"

"You never do your homework."

"True, but still." I smirked, opening up my backpack to pull out the needed materials to copy down the homework. Jade had been smiling brightly and bouncing slightly for quite a while, so I finally asked, "What's going on, Jade?"

"Okay so you know Feferi Piexes?" I noticed Sollux perk up. To fill you in real fast, Feferi was a cheerleader, totally hot, and had a great personality. Sollux also had the hots for her. "She just promoted me to co-captain!" She squealed. "Isn't that great?!"

"It _definitely_ is!" Vriska said, in that tone that made everything seem sarcastic and mocking. I gave her a quick glare as Jades excitement quieted down.

"Dude,"I gave her an accusing look.

"What? I'm just agreeing with her!"

"Why do you have to say everything that… mean?"

"You literally bullied Sollux here into joining our group so that you didn't have to do your science homework, and now you're accusing _me_ of being mean?"

"Sollux likes it here—,"

"I do!"

"—and I'm just asking you to watch your tone." Before Vriska could say whatever remark she was going to, Gamzee stepped forward and put his arms around both of their shoulders, giggling like an idiot.

"Why don't we all just motherfuckin' cool down and slam a cold faygo?"

Dave shoved his arm away. "Nobody wants any of your nasty soda."

"Tavbro likes it." Vriska scoffed.

"Tavros is the most undignified human—no, it'd be embarrassing to refer to him as the same species as me—_thing_ that I've ever come in contact with."

"He's not that motherfucking bad! He's a great guy."

"_I_ think he needs a little push. Down the stairs, that is." She cackled. Yes, cackled. Not laughed, not snickered, she _cackled_ like a goddamn witch.

"Vriska!"John shouted, his voice full of offense, "Tavros is in a _wheelchair_, you don't say those kinds of things about people in wheelchairs!" She rolled her eyes as the rest of the group agreed with John.

And at that moment, a kid walked by. He was short, with puffy dark brown hair and boring brown eyes with dark circles under them. He looked like he was trying to hide his face in the oversized turtle neck sweater that he was wearing. He walked quickly past us, but halted stiffly in his tracks when Gamzee said, "Hey? Who the fuck are you?" He didn't say it in an intimidating tone, it was just his usual 'oh heeeeey motherfucker how's it going wanna go slam a fuckin' faygo?'tone of voice. The kid looked back at us, glaring.

"Why do you care?" His voice was surprisingly rough, and angry.

"'Cause. I know everybody here, but I don't know you. That means you're new."

He stayed silent for a moment, before turning away and heading up the stairs as he said, "I'm Karkat. Karkat Vantas."


	2. Chapter 2: Karkat

**Chapter two already, because it was already written and had been waiting to be posted. **

"I'm Karkat, Karkat Vantas."

I sped up, dashing up the stairs and clutching the little piece of paper that had all the classes that I would have to sit through this year written down. I tried to forget the group of people that were obviously the douche bag group. The guy that talked to me was freakishly tall, and smelled of cigar smoke. Not to mention the creepy face paint covering his face entirely. I shuddered at the memory and started thinking of everyone else in that small group.

The guy with different colored glasses seemed alright, or at least not harmful. There was a boy with black hair and dorky glasses, a girl with blue in her blonde hair who was leaning against the dorky glasses guy, and an over excited girl standing right next to what seemed to be the leader of the group. The leader looked like a total douche bag, I mean come on, he was wearing _shades_._Inside_. He had really pale skin, which would probably be my skin color, if I didn't have naturally dark skin. I stared down at my paper and back at the classroom numbers, trying not to attract attention to myself. The last thing I needed was more people asking who I was. Not like that mattered anyway. The first class on my list was math, room 413. Great, my worst subject first thing in the morning. Oh this will be _fun_.

I reached the room with about 5 minutes left, so I got up to the teacher to say something along the lines of'hey I'm the new kid, please don't make me introduce myself in front of this entire class, because I will fucking die if that happens.' Okay maybe not quite that but the idea was there. The teacher told me that there was a spot in the back and directed me over there. I put my stuff down and sat at the desk to look around the room. It was fairly big; enough so to hold twenty or thirty desks, the teacher's desk, and about ten extremely old computers in the back. The lights hung from the roof, brightening up the dull gray walls, with pictures of—what are those, planets? They look like fake planets—hanging. The bell rang, its loud pitch refusing to stop for at least ten seconds. Lifting my head up, I saw the douche bag kid walk through the door—ok, I guess it's not fair to call him 'the douche bag kid' when I know nothing about him, but come on. Shades. Inside!—and sit next to me. His pale blond hair was short and his bangs were pushed to one side. He seriously was the doucheyest person I'd seen at this school so far.

"Hey Kitkat, right?" His voice was smoother, and softer than I would have expected from him.

"You know, when I told you my name earlier, I'm pretty damn sure I said Karkat, not Kitkat. Wait, let me check, yep. I said Karkat. Kindly go fuck yourself."

"Jeez, I was just saying hi, don't have to act all defensive,"

"Ugh," I groaned. My curiosity was strong, so I said, "Well, you know my fucking name, so what's yours? Or do I have to call you something else? What about insufferable prick? That would work."

"Actually I've been called that before but—."

"Gee, what a surprise."

He looked angry for a moment, but he breathed in and cracked a crooked smile. "But the name's Dave Strider, the cool kid who runs this school," he leaned back in his chair, trying to look cool, and kind of ho—_No_.

'_Karkat_,' I mentally screamed at myself, '_it's been half an hour, you can't possibly think he's hot. Plus if you fall for him, he's not gonna like you back. You're a freak, an outsider, and he's the 'cool kid' (or so he says), he probably has lots of girls and guys falling for him. This is not a romcom! He's not gonna change himself for you so what's the point?'_

"Great, now you can do whatever you want. And if you don't mind, I'm actually going to pay attention to the class now," I turned my head to the front, getting out my math journal and jotting down the starter problem, so I could start trying to figure it out.

I suspected he had just rolled his eyes and focused on the front of the room as well. I can tell that this is going to be the hardest class; with all the work, and Strider sitting right next to me. Maybe I can ask to switch seats. Or classes. Or states.

The teacher talked for the whole period about exponents and shit we already learned in eighth grade. I will never understand why highschoolers have to learn the same shit as middleschoolers. I don't know if it was because I'm new, or if this was how it's always taught, but the class was taking forever. My eyes glanced to the side to look at Dave every now and then, and to my surprise he wasn't even working. He has his phone in his lap, and was pretending to be taking notes. That bastard. Well it is what the dimwit douche bags at my old school acted like, so it shouldn't be that surprising.

The freckles on his face stood out compared to his skin, and there were a lot of them, making him look somewhat cute. Only somewhat though. His hair was platinum blonde, almost white. Like mine, before I dyed it. I don't plan on telling anyone that it's dyed, that didn't work out well at my old school. He had a piercing on his lip, just a small metal band circling back into his mouth. I turned my head back to my work, hoping I hadn't been staring for too long, and also hoping he didn't see me staring. I could feel my face getting hot. Well fuck. My attention went back to the work, trying to force the image of Dave Strider out of my head. '_Tough luck, dumbass. What part of 'this isn't a fucking romcom' did you not understand?' _


	3. Chapter 3:Dave

I was very aware that that Karkat kid was glaring at me throughout the entire class time, so of course I pulled out my phone to distract myself from his stare. I opened up my messages and began to text Jade, during her English class. Eventually she stopped answering me, so I figured she got caught. Typical Jade, she was terrible at hiding her texting, she laughed at everything, and that gave it away.

When the bell finally rang, I shoved everything into my backpack and left the room. I passed by Jade during this passing time, so I decided to ask her then. "Hey," I greeted when I saw her.

"You got my phone taken away, you dickhead!" Jade yelled, but I could tell she wasn't really mad, otherwise her tone would've been much more scary.

"Your fault, not mine." I shrugged.

"Ugh, why did you have to text me? Next time you should just text your _boyfriend._"

"John is not my boyfriend, and he is also 'not gay'."

She scoffed, crossing her arms. "Not gay, my ass. He's almost as gay as you are." She smirked.

I rolled my eyes, ruffling her hair, "I'm going to class, later dork." She giggled as I walked away.

Next was my music class, which we called "Rock Band Class", though the official name for it was just "Band". I played the drums, and I was pretty damn good at it; though I preferred to work with my turntables. When I opened the door, Vriska was already sitting in our usual spot, fixing the tuning on her electric guitar. "Hey, loser," she said when I sat down by her.

I scoffed, "I bet you call all of your cool friends that."

"I don't have any cool friends; all of my "friends" are complete _losers_."

"Wow, Vris. I'm honestly offended right now."

"You sound like Mr. Vantas," Vriska rolled her eyes.

"Did you just say Mr. _Vantas_?" I looked up from Vriska to the seat directly in front of us, where Karkat was turning around, a look of terror on his face. Jeez, this kid was hard to figure out.

"Uh, yeah?"

"Oh my god, please tell me this is a joke. Uh, what does he look like?"

Vriska looked at him weird, "Why do you care?"

"Does he," Karkat paused, trying to put his words together; "Does he look sort of like me?"

"Holy shit," Vriska looked him over, "he looks a lot like you."

"Fuck, of all the fucking schools for him to teach at…"

"Explanation please, Vantas," I realized it as soon as it left my mouth. _Vantas._ "Wait, really? Are you guys related?"

"He's my cousin."

"Whoa." And as I said that, our teacher stood up.

"Alright, class! We have a new student. Karkat Vantas, if you could just come up here." Karkat's body went completely rigid, and he hesitated before sliding awkwardly out of his chair. He stepped up next to the teacher. "Go ahead, introduce yourself."

"Um, I'm Karkat Vantas—," the kid was having trouble, obviously, so I shouted from the back of the class.

"Yo! Kitkat!"

"Do. Not. Call. Me. Kitkat." He crossed his arms, and I smirked at his, giving him double pistols.

"Dave," our teacher warned, "Anyway, Karkat, what do you play?"

"The—uh, the bass."

"Oh, I have one of those right here. Care to play us something?"

"I'd rather not…"

"Aw, come on, Kitkat!" Vriska called up, "Play us something! If you're any good, that is." In an angry determination, Karkat took the bass and slung the strap over his shoulder. Our teacher turned on the amp, and he started playing, and god _damn_, he was good.

Not only was he good, though, he was passionate. He seemed oddly at place, even though he was small and tiny and the bass was large and oversized. It almost made him seem a little smaller. When he finished, he passed the bass back to the teacher and he went to put the bass away, complimenting Karkat. As he walked back to his seat with his hands in his pockets, Karkat's body tensed up. My guess was going towards he didn't like all the attention, but that'd be dumb. Who doesn't like having an entire classroom cheering them on?

**Something weird happened with the text on the latest chapter, thank you to ****SecretPrussianCitizen**** for pointing it out to me. I'm reposting it now, so let's hope that it actually works this time. Next chapter should be posted tonight! **


	4. Chapter 4: Karkat

God I wish they would shut up. I don't deserve their cheers, why the fuck were they cheering anyway? It's not like I played as well as I could've, those were just some warm up songs. I sat down and waited for them to stop the clapping and occasional whistle. Eventually they stopped, and got their own instruments out, as well as sheet music.

The room filled with the sounds of trumpets, flutes, percussion, and any other instrument in the room. Seriously ,there were way more than back at my other school. What even is that? A clarinet? Looks too big, maybe a bass clarinet? Yeah that sounds right. The person playing it wore a hoodie a few sizes too big for them and had short brown hair that was moved to one side. They don't look like part of the douche bag group, so maybe friend material, or just one of those people I don't need to worry about. Maybe.

The boy next to me was playing the guitar, and was actually pretty good. I recognized what he was playing as a part of 'Hey there Delilah', and it sounded amazing. He had his hair flipped to one side, but the right side instead of the left like the bass clarinet player. Maybe he could help me learn the new music, who knows.

I stood up and walked over to the teacher, trying not to trip on anyone's bags. I finally made it to him and asked about borrowing a bass for the day as well as some music. He smiled at me, and gladly handed me the bass from earlier and two different pieces. One looked a lot harder with all the tempo changes, flats, and dynamics, but nothing that looked like I couldn't figure out in a week or so. I went back to my seat and started site reading the new music, remembering to check any flats and sharps before I start.

The rest of the class flew by, and I didn't really want to face the rest of the day, I'd much rather stay here all day._ Ugh._ I gave the bass back and promised to bring mine tomorrow. Putting the music sheets into a folder and then stuffing the folder in my bag, I took the list to see what class is next. Social Studies. Hey look, a subject I actually like and can get good grades in. Hopefully Strider isn't in my class again, there is only so much I can take knowing he's in the same class as me. But maybe it wouldn't be so bad to have him in another class or two- '_no. Seriously? Again? This is like the 7th time in the past two_ _hours. Would you stop thinking about him already?!'_ I mentally screamed at myself as I walked to my next class in room 612.

The class room was already filled by the time I got in there. No sign of Strider, so there is a plus side to this. I tried to find the teacher in the groups of kids, and as soon as I did I tapped on his back.

"Um, hi, I'm the new student and I was wondering where to sit? Cause I'd like to know where and- oh you have _got_ to be kidding me."

The teacher turned around and showed the smile that I know all too well as the smile that he does when he's faking happiness. "Ah, Karkat! I was wondering if you would get my class. Your parents told mine that your side of our family was going to move over here and that you were going to start school here. I'm so happy that you made it here in time for a project we'll be starting today. Now, of course, this is my class so when you're here you must call me Mr. Vantas, not Kankri. Okay?"

"...yeah."

"Good, you can do sit next to Kanaya, she's the one in the back with the short brown hair and the long red skirt. I expect you to pay attention in this class and to do your homework. I need to start now, so you can go sit down. I'll talk to you this afternoon to get you caught up with everything you need to know as of right now." Kankri walked away after that and left me to go find the seat.

I took my seat and got a journal out when I heard the girl next to me laughing quietly. I turned to her, and she smiled at me. "I'm so sorry you got stuck with a teacher that can run his mouth for hours. Personally, I'm sorry for his parents," she held her hand out to me. "Kanaya Maryam, and you are?"

I took her hand and shook it, "Karkat Vantas. And yeah, I'd feel bad for his parents too. If I thought that they didn't like his ever-lasting speeches as well; but I know for a fact they love them. And trust me, I feel sorry for any one in his classes." She stares at me, then laughs softly again.

"Vantas, hm? I take it you're related to him?"

"Unfortunately, yes."

"And I also take it that you dislike him?"

"Very much so. You should see him at family parties, especially holidays. He always has speech's prepared, all about whatever holiday it is and that holidays history and ugh. His parents are the only ones who like them. And every time he comes over he just bursts into my room and starts talking about god knows what. And he doesn't let me leave or talk." I groaned.

"Karkat, Kanaya. If you would please cease your talking and pay attention to what I'm saying, it would greatly benefit your learning." We both turned back to the front, and Kankri began his lecture. It didn't take long into his words before he was interrupted again.

"Hey, excuse me chief," a boy stood up.

"Yes, Cronus?"

"I need to use the bathroom."

"You always use the bathroom at this exact time; I'm beginning to think that you are simply trying to get out of my class."

He shrugged, "My body's on a schedule. It's natural."

Kankri sighed, "Fine. Go, but hurry back."

Kanaya leaned over to me, "That's Cronus Ampora. He's a Senior who was held back like three years. He was going to drop out of highschool to become a musician or something, but his dad is making him stay."

"Isn't he older than eighteen?"

"Yeah, he's Mr. Vantas's age. But his dad was so controlling over him and his brother that he just continues to do whatever his dad tells him to do."

"Damn."

"Karkat, Kanaya. If I have to tell you again to stop talking, then I'm going to give you both detention." I huffed, and Kanaya and I both turned back to his lecture.

**Remember when I said that the next chapter would be posted that night? I lied. Sorry I just didn't have the time and motivation to finish this one, but if all goes well then the next chapter should be posted soon. Thank you for reading, and please review! **


	5. Chapter 5: Dave

I was walking through the halls, on my way from Chemistry class, when I witnessed a very interesting conversation. Karkat and Kanaya were walking out of class together, and get this: Karkat was _laughing_. Real, actual, non-sarcastic laughing. Kanaya got him to _laugh_. "My next class is down that way," he said.

"Oh, I'm the other way. Perhaps we could exchange phone numbers?"

"Yeah, sure. Here, I'll write it down for you." Oh hell no. Hell no, she did _not_ get his number before I did.

When they waved goodbye and went their separate ways, I approached Kanaya. "Oh, hello Dave. How are you?"

"Don't you 'how are you' me, Kanaya. I know what you did."

"And what exactly did I do?"

"Stole Kitkat. I called dibs on him, you can't take him."

"Dave, you can't call dibs on a person."

"Well that's too bad because I did call dibs."

"Dave you can't—"

"Kanaya. I. Called. Dibs."

"So you're telling me not to be his friend?"

"Well I guess you can be friends but he's mine and you can't have him."

"Do you have a crush on him?" She gave me an accusing, yet intrigued, smile.

"What? No."

"You just told me that I can't go out with him because he's 'yours'. I'm pretty sure that means you have a crush on him."

"I'm not that gay man I do not have a crush on Karkat."

"Dave."

"…Okay maybe I have a little crush on Karkat."

"Oh, that's adorable! I simply must tell Nepeta about this."

"No, no. No telling anybody about this okay? I literally just met him today, I don't even know how I feel about him. Look, stay out of this and act like you never heard about that. Just, no stealing Karkat, okay?" I turned to walk away, with Kanaya smiling at me like an idiot.

"Oh, Dave! One more thing."

"What?" I turned back around.

"Your friend, Gamzee, I believe."

"What about him?"

"He's 'stealing' your boy," she pointed down the hall.

I turned around, looking through the crowd. Sure enough, there Gamzee was: his shoulder against the wall, talking to a slightly uncomfortable looking Karkat with that stupid, flirty smirk on his face that meant he had been smoking. I muttered a thanks to Kanaya and began shoving my way through the crowds.

***zelda music* I finally finished this hahahhhh I'm so good at being a productive writer. If you're following my other stories as well, another chapter of Love at First Chat should be coming out tonight, so look forward to that!**


	6. Chapter 6: Karkat

I gave Kanaya my number and said good bye, smiling. _'At least now I have a friend,'_ I thought. I walked down the crowded hallway to my next class, when one of the guys from earlier stopped me; and by stopped me I mean grabbed my arm and pulled me next to the lockers.

"Hey motherfucker," he said, with a ridiculous smirk on his face.

"Let go of me," I tugged my arm away a bit, but he held his grip.

"But I want be the bestest of friends with the new kid," he leaned in closer to my face and I started to get more uncomfortable than I already was, from both his presence and the smell on him.

"Have you been smoking?!" I coughed, trying to make sure that shit wouldn't get into my lungs.

"Maaaaaybe," he grinned, his gaze lazy as he continued to lean in closer. He let go of my sweater and I started to panic. _'Oh shit. Is he going to kiss me? Fuck, I don't even know this kid! Somebody please come and help me oh shit—!'_

"Gamzee! Gamzee, whoa, hey let the guy go. Can't you see you're scaring him to death?" Just like that Strider got in between me and the freakishly tall kid. His arms are stretched out, trying to protect me.

"Aw, I was just having some motherfucking fun, no harm done," he leaned back, away from me and slipped his hands into his pockets.

"Have you smoked recently?"

"…..uh," he hesitated.

"Gamzee."

"….yes." he looked guilty, probably because of the stare down he was getting from Dave.

"Go find Tavros, he can get you to calm down; and don't try to kiss anyone else, got it?"

"Yeah Davebro, I got it," he turned away and started walking into the flow of kids. Dave turned around, looking at me.

"You okay dude? Gamzee can act a bit weird when he does that, and you looked pretty freaked out for a second," he actually talked to me and wasn't a douche about it.

"I'm fine, I didn't need your help," I felt my face get hot and turned away, hoping he didn't see.

"You sure?" I nodded and turned to walk away, only thinking about how I blew my chances with him, but he grabbed my arm to turn me around to face him. I winced.

"You're not going to try and kiss me too right? Does anyone actually give a fuck about personal space here?" Dave let my arm go as soon as I mentioned personal space.

"You wish I would kiss you, but no, I just wanted to know if you needed help to your next class," damn, I did wish. Why do I wish that? No, fuck that, he can keep his kisses to himself.

"No, chemistry is just down the hall; I think I got it."

"Gimme your schedule," he held his hand out.

"What? Why?"

"Just give it," I glared at him, but gave it to him anyway and he scanned over it. I wished he'd show more emotion, I couldn't read his face at all.

"Okay, looks like we have 1st, 2nd, 5th, and 6th period together, plus homeroom. Okay, we got to get to our next class; see you in PE, Kitkat," he disappeared into the crowd before I could deny that nick-name.

I banged my head on the locker nearest to me before walking to class. _'Why am I such a fucking idiot? Be probably thinks I'm too much of an asshole to like now, dammit.'_

I got to the next class and walked up to the teacher, introduced myself, found my seat, and tried to forget about my fuck-up with Dave. That wasn't a problem, though, because as soon as I sat down this jumpy boy next to me started talking.

"Hey! You're Karkat right? You walked by our group this morning and introduced yourself but then left so suddenly after, which is too bad because you should have stayed and talked with us—,"

"Holy shit, shut your trap; yes I'm Karkat, who the hell are you?" He giggled and stuck his hand out in front of me.

"Oops, I forgot to introduce myself. I'm John!" he grinned brightly and I shook his hand.

"Nice to meet you, I guess."


End file.
